Gold Christmas Crackers Winner Revealed

The votes are in, and the winning Christmas Cracker has been announced...

Christmas Crackers

The vote are in, and we're very excited to be able to announce the winner of the Christmas Crackers competition!

From puns about Jeremy Clarkson's Christmas punch, Darth Vader's turkey preferences and Wikileaks' festive 'sauces'; the quality was higher than ever this year as wannabe punsters tweeted in their entries.


Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars? He gets to open the door to number 10. - @delshout1

And now for the runners up...

  1. I told my Granddad to go to Amazon for his Christmas shopping. He phoned me two days later from Brazil. - @pdwilco
  2. Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine? Because they'd been floored by his punch - @RoundWill
  3. How does Darth Vader like his Christmas turkey? On the dark side. - @delshout1
  4. Why did Santa pour Lemsip into the chimney? He was coming down with the flue. - @MKNA
  5. Why don't Volkswagen hold Christmas Services? They get the readings wrong. - @delshout1
  6. Why is there no Champagne at the Chelsea Christmas party? Because Mourinho got rid of the Fizzy-o. - @starry_sky0208
  7. Why was the turkey at the Talk Talk Christmas party such a mess? It was hacked. - @rwoolfordcomedy
  8. Who's Rudolph's favourite pop star? Beyon-sleigh - @BIGDEEK56
  9. What do Wikileaks staff have with their Christmas turkey? An anonymous sauce. - @jezgee23